Settled

I was driving home from work through the little town of Franklin, Tennessee, and noticed the quaint homes and shops around me. The old houses reminded me of houses near where my grandparents live, which in turn reminded me of holidays with my family. I usually drive past houses like these when it is cold and crisp outside, with snow or bright colored leaves framing them. These houses also were surrounded with red and orange leaves, and a grey, cloudy sky reminded me of winter in the Northeast. I was feeling nostalgic until I looked at the dashboard of my car and saw that the temperature outside was actually 65 degrees. Yes, it is the middle of November and despite cloudy skies, the temperature outside is warm. I thought of how strange it is that the people in these houses are used to warmer, milder winters than I am. It's normal for them. Then I realized, This is my normal now, too.

All my life I have wondered about what life would be like when I grew up. Where would I live? What would I do? Who would I marry? Everything was open wide, there were millions of possibilities, and it was always fun to dream of what life would be like as an adult. I realized today that now I am, and now I know. I live in Nashville, I am a teacher, and I am married to Ian. This is my reality.

This summer I graduated, got married, and began substitute teaching. Teaching renews me and makes me happy, and it is wonderful knowing that I have found my calling. My husband and I have a wonderful, deep marriage where we are continually growing closer together. We keep each other sane and make each other happy. We have little routines like napping together for a few minutes on the couch if Ian leaves for work before me, and giving each other one last kiss right after we turn out the lights at night. I always dreamed about being married, but it is honestly better than I expected. I've been slowly realizing that teaching and Ian make up my life now, but all of it hit me today when I realized that I really, truly live in Nashville.

I live in Nashville. I have an apartment here, a family here, and a job here. Mild climates and beautiful rolling hills are now my normal. While I was at Belmont I knew that I lived in Nashville, but it was still very temporary-feeling. I knew that Belmont would end in 4 years, and who knew where I would go after that. Nothing was for sure. Now I can look ahead 20 years and see myself in Nashville with a family and a house and a teaching job. What used to be so temporary now feels so permanent. Visiting my grandparents in Pennsylvania for a cold, white Christmas was my normal, but my future grandchildren may have a normal of visiting their grandparents in Tennessee for a slightly chilly Christmas with maybe a dusting of snow every few years. When I come home, I will be coming home to Nashville.

I know that God has plans for my life that I don't know of yet. There are verses in the Bible that remind me that as much as we may plan, God is the only one with the final word:

"Now listen, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business and make money.” Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes. Instead, you ought to say, “If it is the Lord’s will, we will live and do this or that.”" James 4:13-15

"Do not boast about tomorrow, for you do not know what a day may bring." Proverbs 27:1

"For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord." Isaiah 55:8

"Many are the plans in the mind of a man, but it is the purpose of the Lord that will stand." Proverbs 19:21

At the same time, God wants us to have wise plans for our future:

"The plans of the diligent lead surely to abundance, but everyone who is hasty comes only to poverty." Proverbs 21: 5

Ian and I are carefully planning our future. We have many different budgets, and Ian gets an email when houses come available that are in the price range we hope to be at in a few years. We hope and pray that God blesses our carefully laid plans, but we know also to remember that ultimately it is God's purpose that prevails.

For right now, I am content with my adult life in Nashville. Nashville, my home.